Yes, ladies and gentleman...it's time for another round of open letters. I really enjoy writing these, and the response from them is pretty good. They are much easier than crafting well written antecdotes in was that is pleasing to you, the reader. So this might just become a regular occurence on Saturdays.
Oi, why are you breaking out so bad right now? I hate you.
It was fun to make fun of you this morning. You really are a creeper and you had my drink made long before I even ordered it. It couldn't be due to the fact that I pretty much have been ordering the same thing for 4 months, it's because you are a stalker. But that's okay, stalk me all you want!
Dear Blue Dress-
Why can't I find you, each day I don't the more I worrry I won't get my costume done in time. How hard is it to find a short blue dress that I won't feel guilty cutting apart?
Dear New Coat-
I love you, no really. i.love.you.
Dear Rachel (I think you are going to make it into every one of these)
Thanks for letting me be exactly who I am. Thanks for letting me cry when I need to, build sheet tents when I need to, and for letting me watch corn-tastic chick flicks when I need to. You are the best.
Is all the chilliness necessary? I'm currently cuddled up to the space heater, awkward positioning and my skin is on fire. Thanks
Dear Pam and Jim-
EEEEEEEEEE SO CUTE!
I'm not speaking to you. Yeah, I went there.
Seriously what has been up with you lately. Did I do something to make you mad? You and I aren't agreeing on anything and that makes me sad. I though you would always be my ally, but you are fighting me tooth and nail. What up?
Dear Red Wristband-
You aren't coming off even if I get gangreen or some gross rash, I WILL WIN!
Dear Cozy Bed and Jammie Pants-
You can stop calling my name, I can hear you all the way over here and there is no way I'm going to get back to you until the workday is over.
Thanks for being there :)
You are fired, like in a big way.
Dear Inexplicably Always Sore Calf Muscle-
That goes for you too.
Dear Large Pile of Laundry-
Are you feeding off of something in there? You seem to get bigger everytime I get home! I mean do you have a small child who's lifeforce you are sucking away, it's like you are the Audrey II! Are you eating people I love to get stronger?
and on that note-
Dear Little Shop of Horrors-
YAY! I can't wait to see you. Jacob awkwardly kissing girls? Count me in.
We make up 75% of the population, yet 75% of my friends are introverts. WHERE ARE YOU? The introverts are sucking my lifeforce from me, I need you to feed back my energy.
Let me make sure I covered everything....cold, no lifeforce, large laundry pile, school, messy hair, sleepy, hormones. Okay, I think I covered all I wanted to today.
If after all this time you are still with me? Thanks to you.